Monday Musings: Transforming Fear to Energy, On and Off the Court

Hi Everyone,

Welcome to Monday’s musings. Let’s get right to the big issue for so many of us, fear.

“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

In 1933, the country was locked in the depths of the Great Depression, conditions seemed horrible, and Roosevelt felt in his first inaugural address that it was time to remind people that all was not lost. 

This great Nation will endure as it has endured, will revive and will prosper. So, first of all, let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself—nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.

Fear can really mess with us, paralyze us, cause us to lose sight of our higher shelves. But is fear all bad? I don’t think so. Fear can also contain a message that we may need to pay attention to. 

The question is really much more, how we use fear? Is it helping us, or hurting us, like in the Great Depression? Do we advance, or fall back? How do we work with fear? Is fear a tool, or a master? 

I read a very interesting book many years ago called The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker. De Becker is a security provider, often for famous people, and he has studied crime in great detail. His primary point is that when we feel something, there is a reason. If something seems odd, there is something wrong, or different. Out of place. We might not know exactly what the reason is, and it may be harmless, but something is different, and we need to trust our instincts and examine the feeling better, deeper. Not just brush the warning signs off with a statement like, “Statistically, dark alleys are safe the vast majority of the time.”

There is always a reason for a feeling, an instinct, it just might not be the obvious one. Our best defense is to use our brains, to trust our instincts, listen to our inner voice. He stresses that when it gets to the point where the situation gets physical, or dangerous, you have already missed several clues, and walked too far down that dark alleyway. 

So, the virus is real, it is dangerous, and we need to take the proper actions. Shelter in place, wear masks in public, wash our hands, physical distancing. That is where fear is useful. It warns and motivates. 

The troubles with fear, as Roosevelt states, is our obsessing, living in constant fear, anxiety, driving ourselves crazy, and away from appropriate action, paralyzed or panicked. Learn the lesson, take action. Don’t dwell in the negative.  

We see this on the tennis court. We know we don’t want to play in fear. Being nervous, choking, is one of the worst feelings, and certainly not helpful. But we want to be aware of the dangers. Play within yourself, not get in your own way. Here’s an example from tennis history: 

Steffi Graf had the best forehand of her day. She won the golden slam (Grand Slam plus gold in the Olympics) in 1988 (I was at the US Open Final that year!). She was the dominate player of her day. Some years, she barely lost a match the whole year. There was really only one player (before Seles) that gave her a hard time, Arantxa Sanchez Vicario. Sanchez Vicario knew that Steffi possessed a great forehand, but unlike most players, she didn’t totally fear it and try to hit Graf only backhands. When players tried to hit only to Graf’s backhand, that allowed Graf to camp in the backhand corner of the court, where she could play almost exclusively forehands (up the line, inside out) and easy backhands (BTW, Federer plays a very similar tactics game). She dominated the court and the tour from that “backhand” corner. Arantxa knew it was suicide to play Graf that way, so she would hit balls to Graf’s forehand side of the court, to pull her out of the “backhand” corner. That meant Graf was going to have a forehand. And often rip it. Sanchez had to be able to take Graf’s punch, but if she was able to do that, Graf’s court position, and running backhand was now expose, her preferred tactics compromised. Graf had lost a lot of her advantage, her strength. 

Sanchez Vicario always played Graf the toughest and scored several major victories over the world #1 at the time. 

It was Sanchez Vicario’s ability to understand the threat (fear) of Graf’s forehand, which was real, but to then used that information as a guide to plan a strategy to survive. Of course, Sanchez had to look at her own skills, her great footwork and court coverage, and realize she could withstand Graf’s first shot just often enough (not all the time), to throw Steffi out of balance and give herself a chance to win.

Know your enemy, know yourself. This is one of the principles in Sun Tzu’s Art of War

There are great sayings from great military leaders that stress attack, and bravado: 

“The best defense is a good offense,” – George Patton 

“Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead” – David Farragut (not just “Damn the Torpedoes” – Tom Petty – ha ha). 

But the ability to respect your opponent, and adjust to their moves, is paramount in the fog of war. 

Offence and defense are related. In the example above, Sanchez Vicario would attack the open forehand court, then defend Graf’s forehand attack, to allow her to then attack to Graf’s weakness (her abandoned backhand corner). 

“The hand that strikes also blocks” – Wing chun kung fu.

This is key element in modern tennis strategy. If you want to get to someone’s backhand, you’re going to have to go to their forehand to keep them honest. This applies to serving targets as well. Don’t just always try to serve to the backhand corner. It will get smaller and smaller as they shift that way, and keep hitting forehands. 

And of course, there is the great military adage, “No plan survives contact with the enemy.” 

In other words, we have to stay present, and adjust to the ever-changing conditions on the battlefield, on the court. As mentioned, there is the “fog of war”, where you are not omniscient, and can’t see everything that is going on, or what will happen in the future. All you can do is plan and then adjust.  

It can be hard to make decisions when we don’t know what the answers will be. And so hard to know what events, or answers even mean. And yet we never really know. Fear can start to creep in. The “what if’s” start to haunt you (There is a real rabbit hole if there ever was one). 

If you feel like you have to be “right,” find answers, and are not able to adjust, you are primed for a fear attack. But who says you have to have the answers. Who sold us that bill of goods? 

There is the classic Zen story that goes like this:

An elderly, hard-working Chinese farmer and his son, had a single horse. They used the horse to plow the field, to sow the seeds, grow the crop, and transport it to the market. The horse was essential for the farmer to earn his livelihood.

One morning, the horse broke the fence and ran away into the woods. When the neighbors found out that the only horse the farmer had, had run away, they came to solace him. They said – “Your only horse has run away just before the planting season. How will you till the land? How will you sow the seeds? This is unfortunate. This is bad luck.”

The farmer replied – “Good luck, bad luck. Who knows?”  

A few days later the farmer’s horse returned from the woods along with two other wild horses. When the neighbors found out the news, they said –  ”Now you have three horses! You can till the land much faster with three horses. Maybe you can buy more land and sow more crop and make more money. Or you can sell the other two horses. Either way, you will be a rich man! This is good luck! “

The wise farmer replied, -- “Good luck, bad luck. Who knows?” 

Next morning, the farmer’s son started training the wild horses so that they would help till the land. While attempting to mount one of the wild horses, he fell down and broke his leg. Just before the sowing season, the son would not be able to help the farmer with his broken leg. The neighbors came once again and commented –  ”This is really unfortunate. This is bad luck.”  

The wise farmer repeated – “Good luck, bad luck. Who knows?”

A few days later, the king’s men started to visit each village in the kingdom. A war had started between their kingdom and a neighboring enemy state. The king’s men were enlisting the eldest son from each family to join the army so that they could defeat the enemy state. When they came to the farmer’s house they saw the son with the broken leg. He would not be of much use in the army and hence they didn’t take him. He was the only eldest son in the entire village who was not forcibly taken by the king’s men to fight the war. The neighbors, some of them with teary eyes, came once again to the farmer and commented – “Your son breaking his leg was really fortunate. He is the only one who was not taken. What a stroke of good luck.“

The farmer calmly replied – “Good luck, bad luck. Who knows?” 

We don’t really know what is good or bad. Often, we need the context of time passing, to even make it apparent to us, and of course that can change. History is rewritten all the time. 

“Few things are good or bad but thinking makes it so.” – Shakespeare, Hamlet, Act II, scene ii. 

As the story illustrates, we often we don’t know what was “good move”, or a “bad move” until much later. And yet we had to live in the present. We need to make moves. We want to know the answers before we act, but there is no way to do so. 

We may even think we know what we want to happen ("Ih business, sell high, buy low"), but we don’t even know for certain what the path is to get there. 

“Stress is caused by being here but wanting to be there.” – Eckhart Tolle

So, we fear the future, we fear we will “make a mistake”, we fear we will do the wrong thing, and yet, we don’t even know, without the perspective of time, what is positive, and what is negative. And things that look really bad now, can be blessings later. And of course, the opposite is true. This is the fear that Roosevelt was referring to.  

So, our goal can’t be to get the answer right, but to be able to act, to act from our highest place, to do our best, to transform fear into energy. 

There is a guided meditation I heard yesterday, that went like this (read it out loud, that really helps):

Mediation: Fear transforming to energy

At this time, In this moment, in this place, on this breath, you are here

At this time, In this moment, in this place, on this breath, you are safe

Take a deep breath, settle in your chair.

At this time, in this moment, in this place, on this breath, everything is going to be OK

Notice your breath, notice how effortlessly it works for you

it breathes in, it breathes out, nothing for you to do. 

Notice thoughts that come, you may notice thoughts that come to replace those thoughts,

Just watch as these thoughts jockey for position, vie for your attention

These thoughts are not you, these thoughts happen to you, they come to you, they are not you

As you step back and observe them, you lessen their control, 

Breathe, in this time, in this moment, inhale a deep peace that surrounds your space right now

Focus your attention on how you feel in this moment. What is coming up? Happy, restless, afraid? Lots of different feelings occupying different places in you?

Notice these feelings, just observe the feelings

Those feelings are not yours, they are not you, those feelings are just happening to you

Sit back and observe, as they jockey for position, and vie for your attention, to control your actions

In this moment, in this place, on this breath, you get to choose

Thoughts and feelings have a tricky way making us believe they dictate our action. They don’t

You get to choose.

At this time, in this moment, on this breath, in the safety of right now, let’s actively make a decision to create a feeling in us. 

Call forth courage. 

Take a deep breath of bravery.